Ernie Jurick: Traumatized at an early age when he discovered that he was illegitimate on both sides of his family, Ernie apprenticed himself to a group of wandering Gypsy typists, roaming the hills of Newark, New Jersey, with his Olivetti portable and composing odes and quatrains in his idle moments. His writing skills soon led to a position as a public scribe in the marketplace, then to work as a mild-mannered reporter for a leading metropolitan newspaper. Once his secret identity as Lois Lane was uncovered he turned to writing advertising copy. His most well-known ad slogan, "It's Finger-Lickin' Good," would probably have been more effective had he not been working on the Preparation H account at the time. His avatar presently resides in Portland, Oregon, although his physical body remains locked in a continuum on Second Life as a display in a taxidermy shop. Ernie writes the words that make this web site sing, he writes the words, he writes the words....
Ditty Nicolaides: Also known at various times as Ditty, Dancinfool, Laboratory Goddess or "Hey, you!", Ditty aspired to becoming a prima ballerina but changed her mind when she discovered that pointe shoes hurt and operating a meth lab was far more lucrative. Eventually driven out of her home town of New Orleans by angry peasants with torches and pitchforks, she hid in the mountains of East Tennessee, working as a cadaver in the medical school there. After meeting Ernie on-line in alt.kinky.donkeys.nuns.ping-pong balls.taffy 'n hot sauce, the rest was history, or later became so. Andrea is the artist responsible for the images in the Museum of Depressionist Art and the Gallery of the Unidentifiable and also for maintaining the web sites.