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"Buddhist Monk Misses Nirvana Due To Cell Phone Interruption"
India? [date & provenance disputed]
~ 22.8 cm, soapstone, pigment, gold foil






















And again the Buddha spoke, and was heard to have said: 

"Now this, monks, is the Noble Truth of the disenchanted state: birth is disenchantment, aging is disenchantment, death is disenchantment; sorrow, lamentation, pain, grief, & despair are disenchantment; association with the unbeloved is disenchantment; but most of all attachment to the things of this world is.... "

<cell phone ringtone plays "Smells Like Teen Spirit"> 


"'The world is maya, illusion' -- meditation center, good morning, this is Siddhartha." 


"Oh, hi, I was just about to call you..."

"Well, I always answer that way-- I'm a monk, remember? It's what we do."

"Of course I was meditating. As a matter of fact I was this close to Nirvana when the phone rang."

"No, no, I didn't mean it like that, but you really shouldn't call me at the meditation center, it's..."

"You know I always like to hear from you, it's just that..."

"The begging bowl? Let's see... maybe 6 rupees, 40 pice so far. It's been a slow day. I think that's why I got so close to Nirv--"

"Sure, I can do that. On my way home."

"Wait a sec. Let me beg a pencil from somebody... 

"Okay, shoot."

"...tomatoes, saffron, onions... yeah... eggplant if it's really ripe... couple of plantain... got it."

"Oh... no later than sundown if I have to stop at the market."

"No, I don't mind stopping at the market, I really don't.



"Love you too... bye." 


"Now where was I? Oh yeah, OM MANI PADME HUM..."


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